The Mushroom Song

© 1988 Stephen Savitzky. CC-by-nc-sa.

Wrote this one while my job at Zilog was going down the tubes. They'd just hired a CEO named Sack, and that's just what he started doing...

Lyrics [pdf]

	C	G7
	Now everybody knows that engineers are lazy	slobs

	C
They dress in dirty T-shirts and complain about their	jobs

	F
But Management has found a way to	make them toe the mark:

	G	G7	C	G	C
You	feed them bits of bullshit, and you keep	them	in	the	dark!

because they're

C G7

Mushrooms, Mushrooms, keep them in the dark

C

Mushrooms, Mushrooms, I heard the boss re mark

F

You feed them bits of bullshit til they can't take any more

G

When they stick their heads up cut them off and

G G7 G6 G C

ship them out the door

An engineer told his manager, ``This project is the pits,

A stinking crock of horse manure that gives me nausious fits,''

The manager went to his boss and passed the word along,

``It's a pot of fertilizer and its smell is awfully strong.''

It comes from...

The word it traveled quickly 'til it reached the CEO,

The VP told him gladly "This is stuff that makes things grow,

It's packaged in ceramic and it's very strong indeed;

I think that you'll agree that it's exactly what we need."

It's made with...

The CEO went to the board and said to them, ``You know,

This substance has the power to make our business grow!''

They had the news that evening on the business TV shows:

``The company is growing and it's smelling like a rose!''

They're growing...

The engineer he heard the news and muttered, "It's a crime

How other guys get all the nifty projects all the time.

We have a real disaster here that just won't go away

'Cause noone ever listens to a single word we say!

Because we're...

refrain

We all are...

repeat refrain